The Temple
Three couples, one elderly, one middle-aged and one young
newlywed couple, all wanted to join a temple. The rabbi said, "We have
special
requirements for new congregates. You must abstain from having sex for
two weeks." The couples agreed and came back at the end of two
weeks. The rabbi went to the elderly couple and asked, "Were you able to
abstain from sex for the two weeks?" The old man replied, "No
problem, Rabbi.">> "Congratulations! Welcome to the
temple!", said the Rabbi. The Rabbi went to the middle-aged couple and
asked, "Well, were you able to abstain from sex for the two weeks?"
The man replied, "The first week was not too bad. The second week I
had to sleep on the couch for a couple of nights but, yes, we made it."
"Congratulations! Welcome to the temple!" said the Rabbi. The Rabbi
then went to the newlywed couple and asked, "Well, were you able to
abstain from sex for two weeks?" "No Rabbi", the young man
replied sadly. "What Happened?" inquired the Rabbi. "Well, we
made it though the first week. But then my wife was reaching for a can of
paint on the top shelf and dropped it. When she bent over to pick it up, I was
overcome with lust and took advantage of her right there." "You
understand, of course, this means you will not be welcome in our temple,"
stated the rabbi. "Yeah", said the young man, "we're not
welcome at Home Depot anymore either."
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Three friends die in a car accident, and upon their arrival to
heaven, they are all asked, "When you are in your casket and friends and family are
mourning upon you, what would you like to hear them say about you?" The first guy
says, "I would like to hear them say that I was a great doctor of my time, and a
great family man." The second guy says, "I would like to hear that I was a
wonderful husband and school teacher which made a huge difference in our children of
tomorrow." The last guy replies, "I would like to hear them say "LOOK, HE'S
MOVING!!!"
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