Directory Of Humor

EXERCISE JOKES

THE POTATO PLAN
For those of us getting along in years, here is a little secret for building your arm and shoulder muscles back up. Adopt
this regimen- 3 days a week works well:

Begin by standing outside behind the house, with a 5-LB. potato sack in each hand, extend your arms straight out from your sides
and hold them there as long as you can, if you can reach a full minute,relax.

In only about a week, you will find that you can move up to 10-LB. potato sacks. Do not doubt yourself. Keep a positive attitude, work diligently and you will find that you really can do it!

Then, with the same positive outlook, move up to 50-LB. potato sacks, and finally to 100 lbs!!! You will find that with persistance this is not at all hard!

Hold the potato sacks in each hand and hold your arms straight for more than a full minute. Once you can do that you are ready for the final step .

OK - finally .............. start putting a couple of potatoes in each of the sacks, but be a little more careful with this step. Don't overdo it!!

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I have flabby thighs, but fortunately my stomach covers them.

The advantage of exercising every day is that you die healthier.

The only reason I would take up jogging is so that I could hear heavy breathing again.

I have to exercise early in the morning before my brain figures out  what I'm doing.

I don't exercise at all. If God meant us to touch our toes, he would have put them further up our body.

I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.

If you are going to try cross-county skiing, start with a small country.